For most of us, our childhood home is a haven of memories, family time, and early experiences. But you have to move out eventually either for higher studies, new jobs, or simply to get your own space. And what’s left behind is a void.
A few years back, celebrity Chef Gordon Ramsay revealed that he was also suffering from empty nest syndrome as his son, Jack, left for college. The otherwise tough guy who is known for his verbal roasting said he was “gutted” at having to say goodbye.
Even though not in India, the COVID situation is under control in many countries abroad. This has led to many children moving into their college dorm/accommodation and starting afresh. The anguish Ramsay felt is something most parents go through at some point in their lives, and this leaves behind a void that is not easy to fill. The noise in the house is replaced by the unusual silence that makes them feel lonelier. They call you for dinner only to realize the room upstairs is empty now, and they accidentally made extra food. They often count down the days until you come back for holidays.
(Photo: Ariel Skelley/Getty Images)
What is Empty Nest Syndrome?
Empty Nest Syndrome is a feeling of loneliness or sadness parents or caregivers feel when their child moves out. The feelings are natural, and almost every parent has to go through them. As we grow up, they want us to do well and encourage us to get out of our comfort zone. This includes moving out of their nest and trying to fly on our own.
Empty nest syndrome is a psychological condition, a feeling that may take time to fade away. However, past research has suggested that “parents dealing with empty nest syndrome experienced a profound sense of loss that might make them vulnerable to depression, alcoholism, identity crisis, and marital conflicts.” But on the flip side, it has also been deduced that it allows them to reconnect with each other and improve their marriage. It can also reduce family conflicts and give them time for self-care.
The empty nest syndrome symptoms include anger, sadness, sleeplessness, loss of a sense of purpose, etc. Single parents may find it even more difficult to deal with it. Our parents make a lot of sacrifices for us to have a comfortable life. Full-time parents, especially mothers who leave their jobs to care for their children, are more susceptible to these symptoms. An empty nester may also fear for their children’s safety and whether they will be able to take care of themselves. This happens because they feel that their children are not ready to take on adult responsibilities.
How to deal with Empty Nest Syndrome?
As a parent, letting go of your little ones is not easy. But they have to leave the nest to learn to fly and move on. Here’s how you can deal with empty nest syndrome:
Plan in advance: The best way to cope up with empty nest syndrome is to plan beforehand. As you know about your child’s future plans, decide your next steps too. You can arrange a solo trip or vacation with your spouse, join a local NGO, and even a hobby class to keep yourself engaged.
Keep in touch: Talking to your children regularly can make you feel better. Once you know they are doing fine, you’ll be able to move on easily. Schedule a video call to check on them, but don’t overdo it.
Accept the change: Keep a journal and jot down how you’re feeling and everything you’re grateful for. This will help you accept the change and come to terms with it. You’ll stay more positive.
Seek support: Talk to your friends and family about your feelings. They may understand what you’re going through, especially your friends with children of the same age as yours. If this doesn’t help, seek professional help.
As a child, while you are gearing up for a new life and experiences away from home, you also need to think about your parents who’d be lonely without you. Call them regularly and enroll them in a hobby class so they don’t experience empty nest syndrome. You can convince them to go on a long vacation. Also, try to spend your holiday breaks at home with them.
Once you leave your parent’s house, there are a lot of things you need to take care of. Read this blog to know how to do it. You can also check our other blogs on the website.
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