Changing the Perception Around the Buzz ``Women are Women’s Worst Enemy”!
Everyone talks about bromance, but when anyone talks about girl power, it’s suddenly looked upon as fake, cheesy, showing off or maybe because people think there lies an evil motive behind the whole “girl power” ideology.
Meta Description — Everyone talks about bromance, but when anyone talks about girl power, it’s suddenly looked upon as fake, cheesy, showing off or maybe because people think there lies an evil motive behind the whole “girl power” ideology.
Let’s be completely honest with ourselves first. How many times have we judged a girl who wore a short dress with stockings in winters? How many times have we reckoned a girl and said, “Gosh, look at her; she has got so much makeup on”! Or simply because she comes home late from a party? Not once, but twice and we continue to do that. And I am not only talking about society; this also includes our parents, family members and close friends.
Let’s take a minute here and look at all these situations from an unbiased individual’s perspective. A girl wore that dress because it’s simply her choice, and she knew she could carry it well. A girl has so much makeup on because makeup had given her the confidence which she lacked for so long. A girl came home late last night from a party because it’s casual to happen that you miss track of time when you hang out with friends, right?
Now? Did you see any judgement in either of these statements? Do you know why? Because we did see all the women in these scenarios as a blank slate; without any judgements, perceptions and the character she holds. Why do we make comments that pull her down, demeans her self-esteem, and puts her in a situation and makes her feel like she made a blunder?
Because this is what society and especially the patriarchy has taught us to differentiate between a good and a bad woman, it’s the idealistic figurine we have built in our minds. It’s difficult for us to unlearn this ideology.
WHY DO PEOPLE SAY WHAT THEY SAY?
Ever heard people talking about men are men’s worst enemies, or how aggressive they get when they indulge in an argument and sometimes even get physically violent. Hardly! You will never hear a man or even a woman talking about it. The reason is that society never felt the necessity to bring them in the light and set standards as to who is a good man and who is a bad one. The only thing they taught us is, “Men will be Men.” Maybe that’s why we don’t question men, and often, all the questions are bombarded to a woman.
It’s the functioning and the tutoring we had been a student for so long. And getting out of a mindset takes long. Once we start perceiving thighs as usual, equal and even carefree for women, things will change and improve.
And this will start when the women around will start uplifting the other women and stop comparing their struggles, situations with other women. Believe it or not, women are themselves the prey of the patriarchal society knowingly or unknowingly. When a married woman tells an unmarried woman, you have not got enough responsibilities like me; she is somewhat judgemental of her lifestyle.
When a woman says she is wearing too much makeup, she judges her to have her own choices and equally humiliates her. So it’s time we change our mindsets and start uplifting everyone around us. And gradually the time will tell us who deserved our friendship and who betrayed us.
WHY IT NEEDS TO BE VIEWED AT FROM A DIFFERENT LENSE?
When a woman objectifies a woman, criticizes her, confronts the sacrifices, they somehow demean them. It can be a friend to a friend, a mother-in-law to a daughter in law, a mother to her daughter etc.
To empower others, uplift others, and appreciate others, we have to look beyond the criteria set by patriarchy. The day we shift our lens to look at things from a fair panorama, it can only be convinced that women are ‘not’ women’s worst enemies.
When we start believing that society’s norms and so-called rules are not holy, the revolution will begin to proffer. The day when we stop other females from making any negative comments based on other females’ makeup, dress or her bold choices, we would have already taken a step to eliminate this myth and burst it!
We have to look beyond what society wants us to look at. We have to form our judgements based on logic and facts; and once we start doing that, the toxic patriarchy would get crushed.
BE THE CHANGE YOU WISH TO SEE
We are indeed made to believe that women are women’s greatest enemies. And before glory, they wish other ones ill. The reasons are eternal, and people are yet to keep adding more to the list.
They say it arises because of the competition, envy, conspiracies and what not. Striving to succeed, shine and rise. But we have neglected the fact that success does not come by pulling other individuals down. Instead, it comes with uplifting other people throughout the journey. It not only builds meaningful relationships in the end but also shows the true colours of an individual. And what’s life without lessons, right?
Here we are to bust the myths against women’s wish for other women’s ill. However, the truth is that enemies try to hinder your growth in any form, be it a man or woman!
IN A NUTSHELL
We do not wish to promote any toxic femininity because that’s clearly what feminism is not about. Neither do we appreciate patriarchy nor pseudo-feminism; once we get lost in any movement and adopt unethical methods to sustain ourselves, the movement is looked down upon.
The rational notion would be to treat everyone as a blank slate when you first meet. And understand, people are allowed to feel good about themselves, and if they do something which makes them comfortable, we should just let them be!
Patriarchy is dangerous, and to blindly follow it is equally dangerous. And because men and women both can be a victim of patriarchy, the only solution is to stop evaluating someone from the lens we have been wearing for centuries now!